Everyone wants to feel belonged. To be part of something. To have friends. That is how I used to feel. I would always want to be a people-pleaser. Not wanting anything negative just keep everyone happy even if I don't feel the same way about something. Last night, I thought how is God ever going to use someone who doesn't speak up even if it is in my "inner-circle" of friends/acquaintances. So I took a step yesterday and disagreed with someone and yep the enemy has been trying to mess with me ever since. Saying things in my head like "well there not gonna like you now, look who else doesn't like you, people will be talking about that" and finally I can say it doesn't matter. God is teaching me that not everyone is going to like me and I need to be okay with that. I believe he is calling me into something great but he is preparing me for that along the way. Right now I feel completely isolated from the circle of friends that are around me. Not really sure why but I am trusting God because he knows what is best for me. Character is something that is developed through time and character is what he is instilling in me. I am in the word daily and he is showing me things like never before. Praising and worshiping Him with such joy that it is hard to sit still. Giving me visions of things that are beautiful and encouraging. "Blessed is she who believed for there will be fulfillment of those things which were told to her from the Lord" Luke 1:45. He brings that verse to mind when all things around me don't make sense but I see something else in my spirit. I know in my "knower" that it is God showing me these things. All things that are good come from the Lord. I will wait upon Him to move where things need to move.
I don't usually like to stand up for things because I would fear confrontation. I would fear people aren't going to like me. I would let fear controlling me instead of stepping out and letting God take control. How is God ever going to use me if I let the fear of being well liked stop what he is trying to do. Even Jesus was made fun of, laughed at persecuted but He did all for the glory of God. I am writing all of this down because I believe it is a public step I need to make declaring "God USE Me"! Use me to bring others to you. Help me to show others the love of Christ. Not to be popular by man but to please you. I know there will be challenges and even right now the enemy is plotting something. Here is the thing though God's word states I am the head and not the tail. The power of God, Holy Spirit is inside of me and that is all I need. Jesus is all I need. Without God I am nothing but with God he gives me everything.